"Family Matters"
People sometimes ask what I write about. The word that always
comes to mind is family, because it’s the closest thing to my heart. I’ve spent
most of my existence blaming my parents for the things that were wrong in my
life. That only made me a victim, and I’m tired of making excuses. Blame will
never take me to where I want to go.
So I decided to look for the fabric of truth in my family,
and I found it in stories. In a story I contributed to “Chicken Soup for the
Soul: Thanks Mom,” I wrote about a journey to visit my grandparents’ gravesite
in China. The experience helped me realize how much courage it took for my mom
to come to America in 1968 as an immigrant. She had no money and knew little
English, yet she risked everything for a chance to build a better life.
In a story I published in “Chicken Soup for the Soul: Thanks
Dad,” I recalled a Christmas with my stepfather -- a deeply wounded man who
showed me his caring by teaching me how to ride my first bike.
In a recent issue of “USA Today,” I wrote an op-ed about my
father who recently passed away in Hong Kong http://www.usatoday.com/news/opinion/forum/2010-06-18-column18_ST2_N.htm.
One of my goals is to publish a
memoir about a trip to Hong Kong and Mainland China in which I discovered the
truth about my family. I’m working on finding a publisher for the memoir, and I
won’t stop until I see the book in print. You can read the prologue on this
website.
I also created a column called “Family Matters” that appears
in newspapers. If you know a publication that might be interested in carrying a
regular family column, please shoot me an e-mail at ray@raywong.info.
If you know someone in our community worthy of recognition,
let me know. I write for a number of newspapers and magazines, and I specialize
in people who are making a difference.
I do speaking engagements related to the themes of family,
blame, forgiveness, gratitude, culture, and writing. If you know a venue that’s
a good fit, I’d appreciate a heads up. Check out my events page for the locations
where I’ll be speaking. Thanks, and I hope to see you there!
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Fitting Role Models
By Ray M. Wong
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"Ray Wong hit the nail on the head. 'I can imagine how devastated I would feel if it were my son in that hospital fighting for his life. I can also tell you how much it would mean to me to see all the people from my community sharing in my pain.' -- The support from the community, family, and friends, has been phenominal. The parents I have spoken to that have "been here" have been the most help to me. I have said the prayer that every other parent in this situation has spoken through tears. 'Please God, take me and allow my son to heal.'" -- Brian Eveland, Scott's dad.
"Ray Wong has an ability that appears to be on the wane in America -- he empathizes -- walks in another's shoes and then feels their anguish and pain. The Evelands' pain must be enormous, yet it is likely tempered thanks to the outpouring of empathy and prayers from many others who share their anguish. And the most powerful support comes from those that have been 'there.' Like AA or Al-Anon, we are best supported by those who know our pain. Thanks to those who have walked in the Evelands' shoes and have reached out even though it must rekindle their own painful memories."
"Ray is a wonderful Brother-in-Law, I look up to him as a role model" Phong Huynh (brother in law)
